Are you Free?

I'm convinced that one of the deeper joys of heaven will be freedom that is expressed and unbridled forever.  Although freedom is not fully perfect without restrictions, it will be awesome to push through the boundaries of our limited and insecure mindsets that plague us in this sinful world.  One thought that keeps pressing me lately is:  'Have I placed unnecessary restrictions on life because of fear and mistrust of others?'  The answer to that is obvious, and I keep asking myself in key areas:  'Is this the best it could be?'  'What am I doing to make this average instead of awesome and inspiring?'  Inspiration comes when you peek into the ideal state of things, then pull every resource and effort to realize that dream.  Freedom is an inspiring state of things, where you don't restrict yourself or others with negative thoughts and behaviors.  Freedom is a spacious place, full of creativity and warmth, where there is plenty of energy to serve and inspire others around you daily.  Free people are trusting people, who are slow to make assumptions, and spend little mental energy filling in the blanks of what they think they know about someone.  A free individual assumes they know less than half of what there is to know about someone, and gets to enjoy the mystery and discovery of relationships around them.  Restrictions come from us when we're convinced we know all there is to know about humanity, and we place rigid walls around others and their potential because we do not TRUST them!  Now its true that if you are a human, you have probably earned some of that mistrust and misunderstanding from others.   If you have burned bridges of trust within relationships, as I have, then you can respond with faith instead of excuses and cover ups, and say, ' I believe God will change this below average behavior in me, and my apology will soon be validated because of His great power working within me!'  In Christ,  you can live free of that oppressive bondage forming around you by truly understanding your place in Him.  Our potential is limitless in this life and the life to come because of the God life resonating and rejuvenating our spirits daily and forever.  Scripture says, "though outwardly we are wasting away, inwardly we are being renewed day by day."  The bible is  an impossibly frustrating book to read if approached outside of faith.  If you don't believe the words are true in it,  or possible for you in this life to make you free, then its a grind.  Jesus said, 'you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free...'  If you don't believe you are headed into freedom through his word, then the only other alternative is a smaller, and smaller, more uncomfortable restrictive space.  Within the boundaries of God, there is plenty of space to enjoy the euphoria of life with others around you, and enjoy Him forever. 

The Dichotomy in Me

Recent events have helped me tremendously understand the dual nature of who are in essence.  When God is allowed to shed the light on my heart, and take me back to earlier times in my life, and then fast forward to the present, I see things more clearly.  You really begin to understand the effects of sin's stain, and its unbeatable control on our destiny if He doesn't free us.  Everything is affected, especially intimacy with Him and with others.  I see so clearly the old nature still stealing time, and fighting this new nature that God birthed in me at salvation.  What a war that wages, with one inner man struggling to gain strength, against an old man that is ravaged by sin's effects.  Of course its the new man that we want to consistently be, but till this point, cannot boast such a claim.  My only hope for any type of meaningful, enduring wholeness is tied to this wonderful new man that God created in me at the moment I surrendered to Him, and all a work of His grace.  The old man is insecure, selfish, preoccupied with much of the wrong priorities, unfocused, undisciplined, lazy, and full of defeat.  The new man on the other side of this dichotomy,  is full of faith, loves God and others, self-sacrifices and gets on with life as an over-comer.   Romans takes this challenge that I face and makes it clear that salvation starts a necessary war in me, that unless I take on, I cannot ever say I rule and reign in life.  Sin is just to clever, subversive and sinister to defeat on your own wits and good intentions.  Sin wins 100% of the time outside of the saving grace that God freely provides the humble ones.  When I feed my old self, usually through the door of self-pity and self-loathing, moments and often longer periods of time get stolen from the abundant life that Jesus said starts at rebirth.  Thousands of books have been written on how to have your "better life", people wanting to determine the path to a life fully lived, absent of regret and destructive behavior.   Abundant life is now, a gift, not an existence earned by putting much 'good karma' out there.  How exhausting it must be to even try to earn a good life, when you have a sinful, selfish nature fighting you every moment, sabotaging even your best efforts and intentions.  What is given freely to us as an act of God's grace, is way more powerful to live a good life for God, others, and yourself- and is always in abundant supply.   Supply is everything if you want to sustain anything, that is why our penchant to return to self-effort is so deceiving.  We think we can change a nasty habit, but have no idea how much supply we will need to sustain our changes for a lifetime.   I can't tell you how bad I hate the old self in me, how much havoc it has wreaked in my life, my marriage, my parenting, etc...  I can be honest and say that as much as I hate it, there seems to be this default button in me that reverts to its weakness more times than I would like to admit.  Just hating it isn't enough,  keeping in step with the Spirit of God who fosters and strengthens my new inner man is the key.  He is the one who keeps me sane in this war against my flesh, and I feel so strong when He is near.  The Spirit of God is the one who can handle me, bring me under control, and set straight all that gets crooked in my life.  It's becoming a daily prayer of mine to ask the Spirit of God to bring me under control, and allow me to keep in step with Him.  What a better way forward!